The Right Choice (edited)
***I knew when posting this that most of you would assume it was in reference to my relationship with Mister. But I didn't know that my readers would be concerned enough to email, call or IM to "check" on us. I really do appreciate that, trust me...I feel loved!!! So in all fairness I figured I should add this disclaimer that the post is NOT in reference to Mister, he and I are great. I haven't made my decision as of yet about the other "relationship" I referred to (when I do I'll tell yall don't worry lol)...we had a good day yesterday though, probably just another artificial glimmer...but either way it made me feel good, so I'm confused once again. A decision will be made though, quite soon..so pray for me. Yall know I'm crazy LOL***
Lately I've had alot on my mind. I've even been a little hesitant to blog about what's bothering me...but maybe if I write about it that will help me realize that the solution is right in front of me. I've been in this umm, how do I put it..umm "relationship" for a little over 2 years now. We've had our ups and downs as any relationship has, but I think it's come to the point where it's time to cut our losses and go our separate ways. In my heart there's so much more that I want out of this, and so many places I wanted to see us go. There are even times when I think I see some glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel, but truthfully I think it's time to be honest with myself about my feelings. I've been sad and disliked certain things for a little while now, we've disagreed, been upset, talked about how we would change, we've even made promises to do so. All of which have been broken and have left me feeling very unhappy and not satisfied. A relationship...wait a HEALTHY relationship is about give and take right, and ultimately it makes no sense to stay where you aren't happy right? These are all the things that I tell myself...but then it's just so hard to take that step. I've gone as far as looking for "others"...I would never actually cheat or betray this relationship and actually "date" but I can look right? This has just been a very difficult decision for me, I'm comfortable for heaven's sake, and there's even some history...but I have to put my happiness first. I just pray I make the right choice. :-(
Lately I've had alot on my mind. I've even been a little hesitant to blog about what's bothering me...but maybe if I write about it that will help me realize that the solution is right in front of me. I've been in this umm, how do I put it..umm "relationship" for a little over 2 years now. We've had our ups and downs as any relationship has, but I think it's come to the point where it's time to cut our losses and go our separate ways. In my heart there's so much more that I want out of this, and so many places I wanted to see us go. There are even times when I think I see some glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel, but truthfully I think it's time to be honest with myself about my feelings. I've been sad and disliked certain things for a little while now, we've disagreed, been upset, talked about how we would change, we've even made promises to do so. All of which have been broken and have left me feeling very unhappy and not satisfied. A relationship...wait a HEALTHY relationship is about give and take right, and ultimately it makes no sense to stay where you aren't happy right? These are all the things that I tell myself...but then it's just so hard to take that step. I've gone as far as looking for "others"...I would never actually cheat or betray this relationship and actually "date" but I can look right? This has just been a very difficult decision for me, I'm comfortable for heaven's sake, and there's even some history...but I have to put my happiness first. I just pray I make the right choice. :-(
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