My girl Suze...
while ODing on TV this weekend, I watched my girl Suze…Orman that is. Don’t know how many of you have watched her show, but this woman gives REAL advice on REAL financial issues, and she even gets a little gully with it lol. I mean in a heartbeat she will tell you “girlfriend you are being a fool” and we all need someone like that…and yall know I’m all about improving the finances as well, so that’s why I love it. This weekend her show was about how much $$ people actually spend on weddings and the amount of debt they go in to for this one fabulous day. I started to think about how much time, effort and money people put into this day but never put the same or even a close amount of attention-to-detail into the actual marriage. Now don’t get me wrong, a sistah has always dreamed of this day and has mentally selected the colors and flowers and has an idea of what the dress will look like and how many bridesmaids there will be, and the swatches for their dresses, and flowers, and where the honeymoon will be, and what the rings will look like, and how many guests and place settings and cake flavors etc, because I’m just in to weddings like that. BUT I’m also thinking about the life AFTER the wedding, and it’s amazing to me that SO many people just don’t.
This is something that just needs to be discussed you know? Especially when money is one of the main reasons marriages fail as it is. So being the random-question-asking chic that I am, I spark up a conversation with Mister about prenups. Do you think they are a good idea? Would you get one? yadda yadda. Also being the think-I-know-everything type of chic, I was so ready for the response to be “hell yeah I’m getting a prenup”! I mean he’s the type of guy that plans everything to a T when it comes to business and finances. I don’t know a more disciplined person in that area, and to be honest I LOVE that he’s all responsible like that...he’s my inspiration; shoot he balances my all-over-the-place ass out...I need that, seriously lol. So you can imagine the look of confusion on my face when his response was “I dunno…I will love my wife so that won’t matter…we won’t split”. And I’m sure you can imagine my reply…I’m all like “are you being serious? is that realistic?”
Is it? Is it realistic to think that “till death do you part” means forever? Now, I am all for love, and totally believe in it. Shoot it’s ranked right up there with God and believing in myself. And I’m definitely not one of those girls that’s been hurt before and walks around with the “men aint sh*t” and “a good man is hard to find” stank look on my face. I’m cheesy when it comes to love, I’m talking butterflies in my tummy, love at first sight (well not actually love but you know), got a box of mementos in my closet type of cheesy. But I do believe that things happen in life…things that you never thought would. And it’s best to plan for those “things” when you are in love. When you are both agreeable and can make intelligent decisions that are in both of your best interest. Heaven forbid you get to the point where you are clawing each others eyes out and at the same time juggling what to do with your finances; it just keeps the fight clean. I’m all about clean as well lol.
Money is always one of those things people act as if they are afraid to discuss, it’s danced around forever. But come on let’s be realistic marriage is as much an economic contract as it is social and spiritual. I think we allow ourselves to get caught up in the emotions and the hoopla of love and we forget that there is a world of issues waiting out there once you say “I do”…so why not plan accordingly. This doesn’t mean I have turned in to one of those people that enter marriage with a Plan B in their back pocket ready to pull it out like *wham* at the first sight of trouble…I hate those folks by the way. It just means I believe in preparation. Frankly if you fail to plan you plan to fail…
This is something that just needs to be discussed you know? Especially when money is one of the main reasons marriages fail as it is. So being the random-question-asking chic that I am, I spark up a conversation with Mister about prenups. Do you think they are a good idea? Would you get one? yadda yadda. Also being the think-I-know-everything type of chic, I was so ready for the response to be “hell yeah I’m getting a prenup”! I mean he’s the type of guy that plans everything to a T when it comes to business and finances. I don’t know a more disciplined person in that area, and to be honest I LOVE that he’s all responsible like that...he’s my inspiration; shoot he balances my all-over-the-place ass out...I need that, seriously lol. So you can imagine the look of confusion on my face when his response was “I dunno…I will love my wife so that won’t matter…we won’t split”. And I’m sure you can imagine my reply…I’m all like “are you being serious? is that realistic?”
Is it? Is it realistic to think that “till death do you part” means forever? Now, I am all for love, and totally believe in it. Shoot it’s ranked right up there with God and believing in myself. And I’m definitely not one of those girls that’s been hurt before and walks around with the “men aint sh*t” and “a good man is hard to find” stank look on my face. I’m cheesy when it comes to love, I’m talking butterflies in my tummy, love at first sight (well not actually love but you know), got a box of mementos in my closet type of cheesy. But I do believe that things happen in life…things that you never thought would. And it’s best to plan for those “things” when you are in love. When you are both agreeable and can make intelligent decisions that are in both of your best interest. Heaven forbid you get to the point where you are clawing each others eyes out and at the same time juggling what to do with your finances; it just keeps the fight clean. I’m all about clean as well lol.
Money is always one of those things people act as if they are afraid to discuss, it’s danced around forever. But come on let’s be realistic marriage is as much an economic contract as it is social and spiritual. I think we allow ourselves to get caught up in the emotions and the hoopla of love and we forget that there is a world of issues waiting out there once you say “I do”…so why not plan accordingly. This doesn’t mean I have turned in to one of those people that enter marriage with a Plan B in their back pocket ready to pull it out like *wham* at the first sight of trouble…I hate those folks by the way. It just means I believe in preparation. Frankly if you fail to plan you plan to fail…
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